where are you when i need you most?!!

its 1.47 am. im supposed to be studying. instead. im bored by the lectures, distracted by the freakin comp. and now, IM PANICKING!!

where the hell are my freaking brains???

the last time i checked,(about 2 years ago) they were still intact and in perfectly working order. infact they ran above the usual mileage. but, dear brains, now that im in college i'd really appreciate if you'd return.

wait a minute, you say theres nothing in there that will help me? what the hell. so what if ive gone off the beaten track. so what if im not going crazy in a physics class! im still going crazy with building science!

OK that was enough drama.

But i havent exactly been performing well in uni. i admit its new ground. something totally different from what ive been doin (and good at btw) all my life. so now its a taste of struggles and challenges. BUT i hate it when people just file you into the NOT SO SMART category. it gets on my nerves cos it has a negative effect on my brains capabilities. (the freakin internet is another cause, but hey i need some support here!)

well wattodo. life sucks. i betta buck up and slog all the way till friday. God help me.

all i need is a miracle.

melting in the heat

dripping in sweat. its so freakin hot here! why can't people understand the consequences of global warming!

impossible to study anything in this weather. but theres no choice. *U GOTTA STUDY GURL*

submitted all the forms today. was so nervous that i wouldnt get the statements in time. but all was ok. now i only hope that the outcome and everything else is ok. i really have to graduate next year. I CANT TAKE ANY MORE OF THIS!
*ok its not so bad, but i thnk its an utter waste of time to extend my stay here for one module only*
hmm.. that sounds cryptic...

the gecko is still here. i dunno which one i killed before. yucky creatures. go away!

and btw, if i know u and u know me, i haven't told you about this website BECAUSE i believe that theres more freedom in lamenting, groaning and bitching to no one or people you dont know. it becomes therapeutic. *no i do not bitch about my friends, but i don't tell them im crazy either* lol

back to the trees that were once killed to make the paper that i print my notes on. this and CO2 are a few of the causes cause of global warming. so for heaven's sake please replace the trees and stop breathing!

apparition

i look like a ghost. almost feeling like one. the dark circles will soon be my trademark. ive become an insomniac.

im probably cursed.

soon ill be hearing voices in my head. and probably start talking to myself. or worse. talking to people who are not there.

*take the advice gurl! get outta ur room while u can! pray for heavens sake.*

i wish i were normal.

change

spotless. almost. got rid of the intruder too. yucky geckos.
webcasts are boring. sleep inducing.

a million things to do. decisions to make. questions to ask.

my first independant step.
adulthood.

utamamadyanista gentien mandala chakra

no i haven't gone crazy.
antisocial. irritated. perhaps angry.
and probably allergic to my room.

paper was not ok.
i write like a ten year old. i look like a thirty year old.
im starting to forget my real age.

i feel very nista now. (people who don't know sanscrit don't bother to ask me. i dont know either.) sigh if only i'd known. guessing aint healthy here.

i wish i was at home. i miss the laid back lifestyle. the rasthyadu and the sweaty heat. it has character.
the air here is filled with dust.
there are so many places i would like to go to. lunuganga. anuradhapura. galle. just stop by any gama on the way. experience a new place.

stop dreaming. that aint gonna happen.

back to real life. i thnk ive become a pretty rustic person. i dont think i had such a strong asian spirit in me before. but it has grown. you learn to love what you miss. and u appreciate it. i wasnt acquainted with the village before, but now i have a longing to know how life would be in it. the stillness of the nite. the peace. mingled with the fear of darkness. oblivion to the rat race. happiness thru the minima. i dont think i can live there forever, but its something id like to know. something away from commercialisation. i wonder if i would be accepted there tho. since i dont exactly look native.

wish there was something new to do.

...sigh

oh no... somethings wrong with my perspectives.... feeling really shitty abt it at the moment. (btw i can see quite well, its just the freaking blog #*@*@&#)

and then theres the freakin trojan... it appeared from nowhere while i was watchin the lecture... gosh prolly its from sch... :| highly unlikely tho. i have a weird feelin it has something to do with the blog *grave music*

its pathetic to see how computer dependent we have become. i can't even write neatly anymore. and i get upset over a blog! freakin hell... i better get bak to the real world.... ironically, that is webcast! *sigh*
what have we become.

exterminating the bends

one down, 3 more to go... feels weird.. cos i dun feel as if i even sat fer an exam... o well.. maybe ive sat so many that it doesnt make a diff, haha.

the bends keep playing in my head. even when i try to concentrate on SEAarchi. THIS IS A SIGN. shut off the damn musik. its a matter of a coupla days (ya rite... over a week!)

k since tomoro is another auspicious day, (hence we have an exam) i should get bak to the lectures... thank god for webcast! i'd be dead without em!

i need to wake up now. no more bends.

frooti

frooti

they sell frooti here... amazing.
i cant remeber the last time i had it.
memories from the past. the artificial taste of mango. hahah. i've got a silly exam tomoro and this is wat im upto!
haha..

MUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

star 

moi!

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:	insi
Birthday:	3 weeks after valentines
Birthplace:	bombay
Current Location:	singapore
Eye Color:	brown/greenish
Hair Color:	brown
Height:	5'4"
Right Handed or Left Handed:	right
Your Heritage:	indian
The Shoes You Wore Today:	black flip flops
Your Weakness:	laziness
Your Fears:	exams
Your Perfect Pizza:	original italian... thin crust.. lotsa olives... veggies...parmesan...etc
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:	lose weight!
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:	lol
Thoughts First Waking Up:	how much more time is there to sleep...
Your Best Physical Feature:	face
Your Bedtime:	anytime!
Your Most Missed Memory:	home
Pepsi or Coke:	coke
MacDonalds or Burger King:	mac
Single or Group Dates:	single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:	lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla:	both
Cappuccino or Coffee:	coffee
Do you Smoke:	no
Do you Swear:	only under certain circumstances
Do you Sing:	badly
Do you Shower Daily:	yes
Have you Been in Love:	maybe
Do you want to go to College:	already am
Do you want to get Married:	yeah some day
Do you belive in yourself:	yes
Do you get Motion Sickness:	no
Do you think you are Attractive:	only above the neck!
Are you a Health Freak:	not exactly
Do you get along with your Parents:	yups
Do you like Thunderstorms:	sometimes... when it suits my mood
Do you play an Instrument:	no
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:	no
In the past month have you Smoked:	no
In the past month have you been on Drugs:	panadol/ponstan
In the past month have you gone on a Date:	nopes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:	yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:	nopes
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:	nopes
In the past month have you been on Stage:	nopes... unless es counts
In the past month have you been Dumped:	nopes
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:	what???
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:	nopes
Ever been Drunk:	no
Ever been called a Tease:	once upon a time
Ever been Beaten up:	no
Ever Shoplifted:	no
How do you want to Die:	peacefully
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:	designer
What country would you most like to Visit:	new zealand, turkey
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color:	dusnt matter
Favourite Hair Color:	dusnt matter
Short or Long Hair:	short
Height:	taller than me!
Weight:	not too heavy
Best Clothing Style:	should atleast be able to match colours!
Number of Drugs I have taken:	0
Number of CDs I own:	more than me!
Number of Piercings:	0
Number of Tattoos:	0
Number of things in my Past I Regret:	0
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!